Really Good Tissues
When I was in graduate school they told me that you shouldn’t hand people the tissues when they’re crying because you want them to know that it’s okay to do that, cry, and if you hand over the tissues then you’re giving the message that you want them to stop.
I thought that was powerful but dumb, because you could hand over the tissues, which might make some people more comfortable, blowing their noses into a tissue, as opposed to say, on a sleeve, and you say,
“This is not to tell you to stop crying, cry away, please. Crying is good for you. In moderation, obviously, to a degree, for sure, but with me, it’s always good.”
Anyway.
We’ve joked about me wanting a sponsor for the blog, mainly Puffs or Kleenex.
But who has time to really pursue this? I did go after one of the tissue companies, actually, maybe both, and remember a resounding rejection. Life hurts, is the truth.
Generally, when I shop, it’s a guerrilla mission, no time to go through all of the aisles. I know, however, when I’m getting low on tissues at the office, that this will be on my grocery list– KLEENEX.
Because Kleenex is another word for tissues, right?
As a c0-parent of five, and a person who likes to eat, I save a few cents if possible, buy the generics. So the cart fills up with generic tissues, off-brands if they look okay, especially if they come in a pretty box. You have to buy in bulk if you’re a therapist because they go, as we say, in a good week. A good week is a good cry or fifteen.
Anyway, in over the years, very occasionally, someone will say,
“You need better tissues. Buy Kleenex or Puffs. People don’t want to think they’re using up all of your tissues.”
Pretty amazing, but it happens, and of course I say thank you for the advice, because you have to thank a person for asserting, for trying to get the needs met.
I might even say, “Thanks, I don’t hear this much, but I’m not going to take it personally.” This makes the event an intervention. People take way too much personally and it gets them into trouble emotionally. Something to talk about.
“No problem, Glad to oblige,” my clientele will say. People are nice like this.
So this morning I go to the grocery store, and buy several brands of tissues thinking, “We’ll give this a whirl, see which one really is the best, which is the best for the money, which makes a person feel worse, might make a person think, My life is so bad, I even get a cheap therapist! Everything is bad! I’m born under a dark star.
We’ll see what happens.
therapydoc
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